Last day of July....

I hope all of you relished in this glorious summer day – the last of July. We spent most of the day in the back yard with an evening stroll to visit a friend for dinner. Even though summer is officially in full swing, on the way home tonight, I couldn’t help but feel the first chill of autumn as I picked up the first fallen leaf from the sidewalk. I can't tell if this is a sign of autumn or a wind-strewn leaf detached from a branch, but something felt different in the air.

Tomorrow, the calendar unfolds to the “back-to-school” month. (Remember, I worked at a college where the academic year starts in August not September!) This means we’ll see long sleeved clothing ads in the newspaper, catchy Target commercials with teens dancing in wool sweaters, and of course the seasonal isles at the grocery store will be stocked with spiral notebooks, folders and glue...

So happy August everyone……don’t be disappointed, we still have more hot days coming….but as you read this, take a closer look outside your window…..It’s fascinating to watch the seasons shift, especially in its early stages……see if you can find the first fallen leaf and pick it up.

Drum Circle

It felt like magic meadow all over again, possibly missing the full moon by hours. But the drums continued to beat – miles away from the mountain top. Sitting on my Pergo floor surrounding a metal container with plastic rods were Alan and Jace creating a drum circle of their own. At first Alan was reluctant to share his music, but with some coaxing, Jace was brought into the circle of two. Though other toys captured their attention throughout the morning, they often took breaks from car-play and gravitated back to the drum to make music together. Though my Dad thought it was too loud, I enjoyed every thunderous sound.

PostScript – Jace (who will be 4 in November) discovered today that he loves cherries. Though the chicken quesadillas stuck to the pan and came out too dry, (basically a flop lunch)….I felt surprisingly calm about it all. I’m learning to not be so hyper-focused on the food, and to just enjoy the companionship of great people. And that surly describes Julie, Eileen and company!

Julie and Jace brought over some trains to share with Alan.

Blurb about Greene County Youth Festival

MORE PHOTOS BELOW....

Notorious for being late, we pulled into the empty parking lot of the Greene County Youth Festival – 2 hours before they even opened. We thought we were clever for beating the crowds (and the heat) by going early, but in fact we didn’t realize that the fair opened at 12pm. But that’s okay. No one told us to leave. We had the place to ourselves!

Alan and Ivan spent time riding tractors around barrels of hay and playing in a corn pit. The Greenville Fire Department gave the boys shiny red fire helmets and allowed them to sit behind the wheal. We pet the cows, pigs, rabbits and roosters….Alan fed a calf some hay. My favorite were the baby pigs.

Lunchtime was fun. We had front row picnic tables to a live country band. Melanie wanted to request Orange Blossom Special. I couldn’t believe my ears. Alan and I listened to that song about 35 times last night on Youtube (Johnny Cash singing with Miss Piggy). It amazes me how in synch we are! We ate typical fair food – Melanie was smart. She packed a healthy sandwich for Ivan, so Alan had pizza…the most nutritious item I could find. Nick couldn’t resist eating a corndog (where else does one eat such things), and Melanie and I had French fries. Roger had sausage and peppers…..I can hear the arteries clogging!

Of course Alan was intrigued by the fan.

MORE PHOTOS BELOW

Photos from Greene County Youth Festival

Barn Dance

Alan danced with Lanny to “shake it up baby” tonight at the barn dance at the Avallone farm. The democratic fundraiser brought out many friends from the community. We arrived just before sunset, so Alan and I roamed the property. The whimsical perennial gardens took my breath away. We also discovered peacocks, horses, a pond, and of course the barn. This wasn’t an ordinary barn by any means. Yes, there was hay, but also a large rope for the children to swing from. It reminded me of a fun house, especially the loft which was set up with mannequins, vintage furniture and paintings. Glittered scattered the dance floor, and strobe lights spun around the room. Alan banged on the piano. Lots of sweet treats. Lots of fun. It sure has been a full day!

Reuniting....

So many of my memories are internal and personal and charged with a wide range of feelings. When one reconnects with an old friend, it validates the importance of meaningful past experiences that are cherished and valued. Today, I reunited with Helen, a college roommate, who I hadn’t seen in over 11 years.

The last time I saw her, I was still living in my Kingston apartment where my rent was $560 a month. I was making $8.50 an hour as a residence counselor, and pulling all-nighters writing grad school papers. I was rolling pennies for a bagel on Wall Street. We had no internet. We had no cell phones. We both had our lower backs tattooed.

Since then, between the two of us, there have been 2 marriages, 3 births, a law degree, master’s degree, first homes, second homes, and a decade of ups and downs. We recapped our very full lives with each other – spouses too (we are both with the same men), so you can sense the intensity and imagine the enthusiasm at my home today. And while I shall not review the details of our discussions, I will say that it brought me great joy – to the point of tears - to see one of the most beautiful people I have ever known!!

All I want to do these days....

All I want to do these days is walk to Stella’s Station for ice cream (Moose Tracks – 2 scoops with whipped cream)….. This week, I’ve been better at not indulging too much, but it hasn’t been easy. Missing that ice cream! I’m worried because I haven’t been working out at the gym as long as in the past. I think I go just for the socialization, but even that seems to be waning. My endurance is way down. I try going everyday, but I get so tired after 30 minutes, not enough to burn the extra calories. I can’t seem to make it to Zumba and the spinning class is still too intimidating. Why do they turn off those lights? I’m hoping that all of my busy summer outdoor activities coupled with chasing a lively toddler will help prevent me from gaining the extra ice cream weight. But I can’t get Moosetracks out of my mind on those hot days….What’s your favorite flavor?

Other than ice cream, another favorite treat is hot peanut butter and jelly sandwiches eaten at the beach. Something about how it gets squished in the beach bag along with the heat that makes them soooo delectable. So yes, we spent another morning at the lake. This time, we spent more time in the water than on the swings, a big plus for me. However, Alan was Mr. No-Nap today – you would think he would have fallen into a deep slumber with all that swimming, but he didn’t….which made dinner at Portia and Louis’s a little challenging. He escaped out her front door, and I went into a panic. He was in her back yard playing with the rocks. He probably was only out there for 20 seconds on his own, but it was scary none-the-less.

Tomorrow is my visit with my college roommate, Helen. We haven’t seen each other in about 11 years. I am very excited to see her!!!!

Creating a Buzz: Jules and Rick

I’m so envious of families who play music together. I’m hoping that by September, I’ll have a guitar and will be able to play simple children’s songs with Alan. Last night, he was adamant about sleeping with his guitar….that’s a whole other story….

In the meantime, I can vicariously live through my friend Jules. She and her husband Rick played professionally in NYC for many years, and recently relocated to Woodstock. They have been performing locally, and have been creating quite a buzz! They play regularly at the Mezzaluna café and are slated to perform September 8th at the John Street Jam. Hope to see you there!

You can sample their talent by clicking on to their website at www.myspace.com/julesandrick.

Postscript: They have two beautiful boys: Ricky and Ben-Ben

Pop-Pop was in charge!

While I ran errands this morning, Pop-Pop was in charge. Did a great job! Here is a photo of him at "green park". When I came home, we had lunch, and I gave Alan a "big boy" cup. He didn't spill a drop and we clapped...Pop-Pop caught it with the camera....My boy is growing up!

Let the music play!

Waiting for me under the Christmas tree when I was in second grade was a guitar – not from Santa, but from my grandfather. A musician in a band called Society 400 (500?), Philip Tagliaferro played the guitar and banjo. His “stage name” was Phil Terrace. I don’t know much about his musical career other than he played frequently at home and wore frilly shirts out on gigs. I regret not knowing more. I have a photo of him with his band in my living room. He taught me how to read notes from sheet music. The only song he taught me was “You are my Sunshine” and some sort of 50’s song I can play but can’t identify. I remember trying to mimic the songs that were played at church.

I never had formal lessons on how to play. I never learned how to tune a guitar. I don’t even think I hold the guitar correctly. I remember begging my parents to purchase me a Roy Clark guitar book that I had seen on the TV. (remember those commercials?) It had stickers that you would paste onto the guitar so you would know where to put your fingers. These were in addition to the flower stickers that I stuck all over the side of the guitar (I was a flower child even then!)

My memory is fuzzy as to why I never continued playing. It would have been helpful to have more encouragement, but I can’t blame anyone but myself… Maybe I lost interest in the exciting world of adolescence, or maybe it was just poor timing. I think I was self conscious about my voice and playing publicly…not sure…one thing is true, I totally regret not playing more.

A few of the guys played at college, and I picked up a few more chords, and purchased myself a new guitar. Dave, Chip and Matt played at college. Dave taught me the blues scale. My neighbor also played and he had a stack of 60‘s sheet music that I copied. We played together once in my back yard and the neighborhood children and parents gathered around for a sing-a-long. This was my only “public” performance. I have never liked my voice. After college, I couldn’t afford lessons, and gave my cousin my guitar. I probably haven’t picked up a guitar in over 10-15 years. Listening to live guitar music has always been my favorite pastime.

With Alan’s interest in the guitar, sparked by James Taylor’s steam roller (See I've Got a Bad Case of Steamroller Blues blog posting....), I have a renewed interest in playing. (I don’t think it ever really went away)….Sheet music I have briefly looked out seems pretty easy – chords that I know. I just need someone to show me how to hold the guitar correctly, and most importantly – how to tune it! I will muster up enough confidence to start with easy children’s songs….and we’ll see what happens. So I am in the market for a new guitar (an early birthday present!). I will be researching ones that are easy to learn on….I am looking forward to sing-a-longs with the neighborhood children!

Alan and Ivan have a great morning.

As many of you know, my porch has become the epicenter of my universe. Today, with Ivan and Alan under my watch, I crafted a play area on a table for them to orbit consisting of trains and cars which we appropriately named “table town.” I’m still not used to watching two children at once, but continue to gain new skills in this area. Luckily Ivan is a very sweet child who focuses on toys for long periods of time. Only a few iffy moments when Alan didn’t like someone else in the driver’s seat of his bus.

My favorite moment was when we retreated to the back yard and with my prompting, they took turns pushing each other on the swing. I’m also learning how to prevent meltdowns. When Alan wanted to play with the “rocks”, an activity that I didn’t think would work out today, I quickly shifted Alan’s attention to the guitar. I enthusiastically exclaimed that we should go inside to show Ivan his guitar. The two of them bolted back up the stairs and I had masterfully prevented any rock-throwing incidents.

Once in the “blue room”, Alan grabbed his guitar, and Ivan sat in front of the keyboard, and the room filled with “music”. Alan even shared his guitar with Ivan. An incredible jamming session! Could this be the next new garage band in the works?

Singing in the Rain!

Tired of sunny skies and sweltering heat? Me too! A rainy day! How blissful! No guilt about staying inside! A good excuse to stay in pajamas! Though I never got around to baking cookies, Alan and I did find things to do. Instead of the pool, I filled the tub up with extra bubbles. I think it relaxed him, because he ended up taking a 3 hour nap today, allowing me to catch up on client work (and laundry). Later, I spontaneously started singing him the hokey pokey. He really loved the song, and began playing it (in his own cute way) on the guitar while I did the moves...Thirty minutes of hokeying, and I was ready for a 3 hour nap!

“I get by with a little help from my friends”

With a bowl full of cherries and lemonade served in wineglasses on my porch, I enjoyed a much needed girl-bonding visit from Dawn today while the boys were out. I’m grateful that she called. I’ve missed her company (and her humor) since leaving New Paltz. Later, we walked over to the Keirsted House, threw a blanket on the lawn and watched the community band play show tunes. Most of my neighbors were in attendance with their children. Reana (16 months old) sat on my lap for a long time, entertained mainly by my cell phone. Alan listened to the music for a while, but then wanted to run in the “cowflop”, which is the field behind the parking lot. We did that for a while and walked home with Ivan and his parents. Alan didn’t want to leave, so he was a bit of a handful. Luckily, I was in the company of friends who helped me out and understood. Again, “I get by with a little help from my friends.”

PostScript: One of my baby-boomer friends at New Paltz told me that the word “friends” in the John Lennon lyric was really a code for drugs. How disappointing….I’ll have to look up the lyrics again to let you know….

Rosendale Street Festival

Despite a very busy weekend, I somehow squeezed in the Rosendale Street Festival, if not just to delight in hearing some live music. Here is Alan waving a blue ribbon at one of the many sound stages.

Photo taken today at Brio's

Do I hear a train song?

Do I hear a train song?

Alan and I have been listening to new children’s CD called “Fun and Folk” containing various train songs like the Wabash Cannon Ball, Train is A-Comin and Little Red Caboose (which I have been singing to him since his birth). A few days ago I began telling him how we would soon be riding on a real train. “Like at Barnes and Noble” he responded referring to the toy trains in the children’s section. “No, a real train!” I repeated. Such anticipatory statements are part of the fun, especially when combined with train songs.

As we readied for our trip to the Catskill Mountain Rail Road, we played our train songs. (His conductor hat is now too small, but he wore his Thomas-the-Train sneakers). With both his love of music (and his guitar) along with trains, I thought how wonderful it would be to someday take him on a train that also featured live music. But for now, Alan and I set off to meet my parents for another family outing.

We picked the perfect day for a train ride. Located in Mount Pleasant, on the ride up I silently reminisced about living near the Ashokan, tubing down the Esopus, dining at Sweet Sue’s for oversized blueberry pancakes and swimming in waterholes. These mountains are by far my favorite.

Arriving at the train depot an hour early gave us time to explore. I showed Alan bumble bees (there were many!), we sang more train songs, and of course we found more stones to throw. After Pop-Pop and Bootie arrived, I went to the red caboose gift store. I purchased a train (which Alan clutched the entire trip), and a larger conductor hat for him.

My son has never been so well behaved. He happily (and patiently) waited for the ride to start, playing with this new train and “running aroundie”. Pop-Pop was the first one to see the train coming. I lifted Alan up in my arms as it approached and watched him smile from ear to ear. Just like in the songs, the conductor said “All Aboard”, which I believe is now Alan’s favorite new saying.

You have the option to sit inside or outside. We chose to sit in the open car. Alan planted himself onto the bench holding his toy train. As I said, my son has not been so well behaved. He sat there for the entire ride – close to an hour. (an unprecidented event) Several times I asked him if he wanted to get up and walk around, but he kept on saying no. He just enjoyed watching the trees and mountains and fresh air. He smiled at me every time he heard the train bell and whistle. (Did I mention how well behaved he was?)

My father was disappointed with the view, but I found being on a train in the woods to be very special. The creek along side us eventually spills into the reservoir. If I had to guess, I don’t think this was a watershed weekend, because the water didn’t seem too rough. The train stopped in the woods alongside the creek for about 10 minutes for a mini-lecture about local train history. It was hard for me to hear, but my mom reported that they are trying to renovate the tracks to extend the trip all the way to Kingston.

The ride ended with me finally coaxing Alan up from the bench for the last five minutes. I held him up so he could get a better view. We “spied” a toy house, a tree house in the woods, and of course a “wiggles car” as we approached civilization again. We waved to the cars as we crossed Rt. 28, and thanked the conductor for a wonderful trip.

For those mommies who read my blog, I definitely recommend this as a relaxing family outing. Here’s their website. http://www.catskillmtrailroad.com/

PostScript --- Do I hear another train song?

Here are the lyrics to a song from "Fun and Folk" that I just can't get out of my head!!! It has a gospel sound to it, and it's very catchy! (It's a library CD so I'll have it returned shortly should your child also be train-obsessed)

Train is A-Comin'
SpiritualWritten By: UnknownCopyright Unknown

Train is a-comin', oh, yes

Train is a-comin', oh, yes

Train is a-comin', Train is a-comin' Train is a-comin', oh, yes

Better get your ticket, oh, yes

Better get your ticket, oh, yes

Better get your ticket, Better get your ticket, Better get your ticket, oh, yes

Room for many more, oh, yes

Room for many more, oh, yes

Room for many more, Room for many more Room for many more, oh, yes

Train is a-leavin', oh, yes

Train is a-leavin', oh, yes

Train is a-leavin', Train is a-leavin' Train is a-leavin', oh, yes

Wet-N-Wild at Zoom Flume

Water parks aren’t just for kids! We had a playful morning at Zoom Flume in Cairo, N.Y. The trip started out wet, even before we got to the park. I need to read the directions on these Swimmer diapers. By the time I reached the bank around the corner, Alan soaked through his clothes along with the car seat. Apparently these diapers only work in water???

After a quick change (on the sidewalk), Alan and I finally met up with Bootie, Pop-Pop and Aunt Suzie at McDonalds - a place that still conflicts me. As my parents pulled up in their car, I quickly spelled out that we would not be showing Alan the P-L-A-Y-R-O-O-M at McDonalds, something that I believe traps children into bad eating habits. But with Alan refusing breakfast, I felt desperate to get some scrambled eggs in him. Luckily, a booth sheltered sight of the play area.

We arrived as the park opened, and literally owned the place the first hour! Did I feel like a kid! There was so much to see, I didn’t know where to start! Alan was intrigued by the fountains, pool and the various walkways that intertwined the park. I think he loved the “marching” around on his own the best. He discovered patches of moss along with rocks, and initiated a project of throwing stones into the water.

A waterized (is that a word) village with a western motif had water guns and TNT water explosions making me leery of introducing him to violence, but luckily he lost interest in that area, because the older children were too rough, shooting each other with streams of water. A more tame children area had a pelican slide inside a pool with more fountains. Alan enjoyed walking up the pelican, but still to this day has not gone down a slide on his own. I, on the other hand, had no reservations and went down the slide and soaked myself in the spraying water from several of the fountains. I did try coaxing Alan to join me on a lazy river ride, but he just wanted to continue marching around.

While my parents watched Alan, my sister and I went through the Black Vortex, a Dr. Seuess-like contraption that shoots you down a tube in pitch black. “You don’t need to close your eyes on this one”, said one of the workers. She was right! Exhilarating!

You certainly can work up an appetite at these places. Now I know why they sell hot chocolate at water parks. With the weather unexpectedly cool, Suzanne and I warmed up with sips of hot chocolate. After lunch, we headed home, and believe it or not, it was 1:30pm as we pulled up to our home. The day is just beginning, and I feel like it's bedtime!

Alan didn’t sleep in the car, and he is still “resting” (not napping) right now. It will be an early night!

To All the Jobs I've Loved Before….

I stand corrected. Tonight, Bootie (my mother) who reads my blog regularly, reminded me that my first job wage was incorrectly stated in my last posting. I had indicated that I made $3.35 as a library page when I was in 10th grade. I had forgotten that I had been paid 15 cents a basket to pick green beans prior to that. Oddly situated between hundreds of strip malls and standard suburban housing developments, I worked in a vegetable field which sold produce at a stand along Rt. 25. But this was only a one-day job. The amount of time and energy to earn enough money for the arcade and the occasional movie didn’t make it a “good return on investment”.(I also reminded my mother of my other “one-day job” including working at McDonald’s - the smell of hamburger grease in my hair was the clincher).

So, for all the jobs that I have loved before…let me ramble on…..Let me start with WTZA-TV. Hired from an internship, I began the week before graduation, and was proud (and relieved) to rent my first apartment and actually have an office (with a window!) I worked with interesting people a little older than me, and I really connected with everyone. It is here that I met one of my best friends, Marie, and of course this is where I started my relationship with Roger. After producing a television pilot, “Express Yourself” with Doug and Mike (which aired in 1992 and even was listed in the TV guide), I decided that I wanted to work in human services, and lost interest in the technical aspects of television. Basically, it wasn’t fulfilling for me to stress out over the placement of a commercial, I wanted something with social value.

I enrolled at Marist’s graduate program in Counseling and Community Psychology and left WTZA for a job in a group home (intensive/supportive apartment program) run by MHA, a mental health advocacy program. This was another one of my favorite jobs. While many people create labels for people suffering from Schizophrenia and other thought/mood disorders, I found myself interested in their talents. I still have a sculpture and several paintings that were given to me. I reunited a mother with her daughter after 15 years. I learned more about the field of counseling from my basement office on one of the worst streets in Kingston. Had this job paid more, (I was making less that $9.00 an hour), I would have stayed here forever.

Having finished graduate school (took me about 3 ½ years), I left the group home job for another one of those “one day jobs”. I was hired as a social worker at an unsecured youth detention facility for adjudicated youth. I just completed graduate school, and was eager to make a difference in the world, yet something felt terribly wrong. I heard the staff talking about riots and that I should not park my car on the property. After hearing more alarming stories from the staff, I told my supervisor that I changed my mind and walked out. Plus, they had mistakenly given me the wrong salary (it was less than what I had been told). Having left a job that I loved for this one, I felt like I had really screwed up. Now what was I to do? Shortly after I walked out, they closed down the facility for safety violations, among other things.

I used the following month to search for something really meaningful. I ended up finding a job that literally changed my life. I responded to a newspaper ad looking for someone to start an AmeriCorps program at SUNY New Paltz. The job was only part-time, but I would be making the same amount of money had I stayed at the group home full time. Plus it offered benefits, even at part-time!

When I accepted the job, I was elated….a job that actually incorporated the principles of community psychology with counseling! I literally created a program from the ground up. Starting with a few flyers, and a hastily put together brochure, I had over 100 students attend my first series of workshops. We called it the “domestic peace corps” and we provided tutoring and mentoring to at-risk youth. My role was to coordinate and create community service programs and place students at non-profits throughout the county. Later, they hired me fulltime to also assist with internship development and career counseling. Let me explicitly state that the success of this program was mainly due to the students who volunteered countless numbers of hours making a difference!!! Many fond memories!

To this day, I still don’t know what prompted me to leave this great gig, possibly a calling of some sorts, but I left this job to take one with Ulster County to coordinate a state-wide community forensics training program. (police mental health and suicide prevention in jails and police lock-ups). I loved the traveling and the challenge of bringing mental health, medical and corrections staff together to create action-plans, etc. However, when not traveling, I felt lonely and isolated in a small dark cubicle, and missed the constant interaction, idealism and intellectual curiosity that a college campus offers both staff and students. Though I met a few great people at the county, I knew it wasn’t a right fit for me. I took a significant salary cut to return back to campus….

Luckily, my colleagues welcomed me back. I worked for a while again in AmeriCorps and the career center, but had the opportunity to do more personal counseling and advising in a program called the Educational Opportunity Program. This by far is the most important role I have ever played in any kind of solution towards a social cause.
There are many barriers to education, and EOP is an integral part of bridging the gap. I really believe in its mission! Plus it afforded me the challenge of counseling at a more personal level while also teaching a college-level course.

After about three years, I became pregnant with Alan, and after about 6 months of trying a Mr. Mom/working mom arrangement, I decided to resign. This was the hardest decision ever, but I have no regrets. Being a mom has been a dream come true. Plus, I have been able to assist with growing a successful media relations business. For the first time, I am delving into the corporate world, and have had the opportunity to assist with a political campaign. It hasn’t been easy, but very rewarding. New skills learned everyday!

Well that’s my career history. Thanks to mom for inspiring this posting. If you're still with me, on a more personal level, I received another rejection letter in the mail from a Children’s book/publishing company. I’ll put it in a file, and keep trying!

It might surprise you that….

Many family members and longtimers who read my blog have known all of these fun facts, but some of the mommies I have begun to hang out with this year may not..... I thought it would be fun to exchange some information. For the mommies, I'll create a thread on our mommy website with this, because I'd like to hear from you to.... Here it goes...

It Might Surprise You That......

I made $3.35 an hour at my first job

I like rap and hip hop

I can recite all of the prepositions in the English language (and in alphabetical order) – Thanks to Ms. Dizzia’s 6th grade English class.

I have solved the rubrics cube hundreds of times (once in 11 minutes) – and I don’t know how I do it. I only have a few strategic moves, and the rest is trial and error.

I have a small tattoo on my lower back – I had it done in Woodstock in 1992 with Helen

I attended the 2000 inaugural protest against George Bush in Washington DC. (the only protest I have ever participated in)

I volunteered at the Medical Examiner’s office during the Ground Zero recovery efforts. We served food to the DMORT team. 3 AmeriCorps students were with me.

I’ve been to magic meadow. (twice) Once with Eileen, once with Uncle Tony and cousin David.

I was an extra in a Paul Reiser/Peter Falk movie a few years ago, “The thing about my folks” shot at the park down the street. I think that was the title. We never saw the movie.

I wanted to be a nun when I was a kid.

Lot’s of “I’s” so here’s other news:

Grandma Bootie arrived in New York last night to join Pop-Pop for a few days. Despite taking the red eye from Phoenix and with no sleep, she still was able to cook up a roast beef meal for us. Incredible.

My 15 minutes of ....

...fame! Someone recently asked me if they could see the video from the Ellen Show. Here is the link along with an excerpt from my diary from May 2005 (trasncribed from handwritten entries from my journal) The video starts out with a promo, then goes directly into our interview followed by Betty White's comments about Alan.

http://www.rosenbaummedia.com/portfolio.html
(Scroll down then click onto Ellen box)

May 3, 2005
I am sitting in a hotel lobby in Los Angeles, California awaiting to be brought to the Ellen Degeneres Show with Alan and Roger. We will appear as guests because Alan uttered 2 words: “Alan and Boom-Boom”. He is less than 3 months old.

May 5, 2005
Roger, Alan and I are currently taking off on an airplane from L.A. We spent the past two days here as guests of the Ellen Degeneres show. Yesterday we taped the show at her studio in Burbank. A driver picked us up at the Universal Sheraton to take us there. I could hardly believe it. I called Marie and Jim on our cell phone just to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming. I remember telling Jim that I was just passing a highway sign pointing towards Hollywood, and that I could see the letters upon that mountain. Just last week, I was afraid of taking Alan to the supermarket!

Upon arrival to the studio, we were given our own dressing room where they served us candy, water and a basket of snacks. I guess they are trying to jack us up on candy before the show. I breastfed Alan prior to the taping, in the hopes that he wouldn’t be hungry while I was sitting in the hot seat. While waiting, Roger thought he heard the voice of Betty White outside our door. Sure enough, when we were taken to “Hair & Make-up” there she was! She jumped out of her chair to sneak a peek at the baby and said, “It should be illegal to have a baby so cute!”

So there I was getting my hair and make-up done with the fabulous Betty White! She had little white shoes and a grandma-style purse with a kitty design. She looked more worn than she does on TV – her wrinkles become ironed out with the make-up I guess. When she left, Roger was asked to hop into her chair – so that he could get make-up too! Ha Ha!

While we were getting ready, a camera operator tried getting footage of the baby. The make-up crew was running a bit late, so at one point, I had two of them working on me at once!

When I was done, I assisted with trying to get the baby to say “boom” – we got just one “boom”.

Our producer, Bradford, then came to get us. We were already “miked” and ready to go….

They gave us a quick recap on what they expected us to say and as we approached backstage a stage manager gave us directions.

While waiting for those brief moments, we saw Matt Dillon complete his segment. As he walked backstage, he saw the baby, and said, “so this is the incredible talking baby!” and the baby smiled back at him. Then, Roger, Alan and I were introduced to Ellen and we walked onto the stage with the audience applauding! I have vague memories of the actual taping!

I think it might have been all of the people, the coldness and the lights, but he did start to cry a little bit at the show, but all in all we did well.

May 12, 2005
An article appeared in the Saugerties Times about our appearance on the Ellen Show.

POSTSCRIPT: Upon rereading my diary entries from over two years ago, I think the only thing to add is how much I had obsessed over Matt Dillon as a teenager. I had a teenbeat pin-up of him tacked to my wall, watched every movie of his, dreamed about meeting him, etc....If an angel from the future visited that shy 16 year old to tell her that someday she'll be on a TV set with Matt Dillon, I wonder what she would think?

Zinnia

On Friday, I went to Adam’s to buy flowers for the front yard which I have neglected all summer. Normally by this time, we have annuals blooming at their peak including geraniums, marigolds and petunias. But with so much going on, the front yard has become overgrown with weeds. Directly aside the porch, the grass has even grown in where once had been a flowerbed.

So in prep for the house party, I wanted to add a little color to the yard. Knowing that I wouldn’t have time to nurture the garden this summer, I decided to seek one or two perennials which are more robust and need little maintenance. (I don't know much about plants, so I can't tell you if this is true or not). I also wanted a colorful plant to compliment the existing lilies and hosta which continue to bloom beneath the weeds. (so hardy are they!)

I found two red zinnias plants. The color struck me as both dramatic and whimsical – a hard combination that works together. It’s similar to how I feel when I see a Sunflower or Black-eyed Susan. However, the girl at Adam’s couldn’t tell me if the Zinnias were an annual or perennial. As I mentioned, I was hoping to get a perennial, but despite this uncertainly, I took the Zinnia’s home.

Upon a wikipedia reference, turns out that Zinnias come in both varieties. I guess we’ll have to wait until next year to see if they bloom again. In the meantime, I hope to enjoy them this season.

Well, this reminds me of a poem I wrote a few years ago. Previously its title was “Yellow Jade”, but I think I’ll change its title to "Zinnia".

zinnia

and then there were seeds, a perennial and
then there were moments repeated in
the soil. and then there was a stone that
remained underground.

thoughts pace like roots, a persona tangled in the garden.

House Party

Today we hosted a house party for Democratic Candidate Jon Sennett who is running for Ulster County District Attorney. Busy playing hostess, I only caught snippets of his talk, but was pleased with how the group of 35 people gathered to learn more about his platform. It felt good making this contribution. I can tell you that everyone was attentive, asked important questions, and provided a warm and open forum for discussion. Jonathon was dynamic and direct, and very approachable - connecting with people instantly. I was also pleased that everyone was focused on the issues at hand, with no discussion about the event which occurred with the mayor.

So I am only going to write more about my personal experience, but if you’d like to hear more about the content of the lively discussion, I am sure that Jeremy’s blog will have updates later tonight. His blog can be read at http://www.blabernews.blogspot.com/.

I enjoyed introducing people to Jonathan as well as friends from different parts of my life to each other. In attendance was Lanny Walters, who marched for civil rights in the 1950’s, a few Kingston and Marbletown officials, members of the Saugerties Democratic Committee along with some my playdate friends and neighbors.

My dad took the main responsibility of Alan, but I found him also enjoying watching my neighbors kids as well. At one point he had all three of them! I was impressed! But then, with no nap (and sugared up with cookies), Alan had a little melt down in the back yard, and it took me about 20 minutes to calm him down. Portia went around the back of my house closing the doors so that his screaming wouldn’t disrupt Jonathon’s speech. I found myself around the block, and didn’t even make it to see the fire trucks. What stopped the tantrum was the word “Lollipop”. (okay I know it's more sugar, but you gotta do what ya gotta do!)

An elderly neighbor from the senior center wandered into my home and was confused by what was happening. This had me a little worried, because he seemed disoriented. Several people had an eye on him, and I offered him a cup of coffee and something to eat. I’m not sure how he made it home, but Peter from his building attended, so I’ll check with him later.

All in all, I think it was a success.

PostScript:
Thanks to Portia for the gift, her empathy, and for showing me how to use my large coffee maker.
Strawberries with cinnamon-whip was a hit (you know me, all about the food!)

I'm exhausted!

John St. Jam (a circle of friends)

So I was able to unwind tonight at the John Street Jam. My friend was eager to see the venue, because she will be performing there in September with her husband. (I’ve heard her sing before and she is fantastic!) I’m sure I’ll write more about her as the date of her performance approaches …..As a non-musician, it’s interesting being in the audience with a performer. She offered a fresh perspective on live music, and was impressed with the congeniality of the musicians as they accompanied (and supported) each other. I have often gone to this event by myself - it’s that much of a welcoming place. But it was nice to have her company tonight. Last month, Terri gave me a hug welcoming me back (I used to be a regular groupie)….I’m going to try to make it a monthly outing.

Here are photos of who played tonight: http://johnstjam.net/July1407.html
Here are photos from past Jam’s: http://johnstjam.net/photos.htm

Next Jam is August 11th.

Getting things Done!

This is just my ramble for a Saturday….It’s all about time management and multitasking. Isn’t it amazing how much can be experienced in such a short amount of time! So much can get done!!!

For example, when my babysitter is here on Thursday’s, I zoom around town, click on my computer, check in at the office, throw in some laundry and presto…I’m done! Sometimes (everyday), I set the timer on my microwave for 10 minutes. Then, I will allot that amount of time to get the dishes and kitchen table cleared. It’s amazing how much you can get done!

Today, Roger watched Alan, so this morning, I ran to the library (where I could actually look at books without pictures and browse!), worked out at the gym, went to the store, cleaned up, cooked lunch, etc etc etc! It’s nice to have that time to roam!

During Alan’s nap, Roger stayed home, and I went to the store, went for a walk…basically got things done! While most people enjoy the meditative state of relaxation when they have some time off, I enjoy the energy of doing things.…Yes, I’m a bit high strung, but I like that….

I'll need this energy tomorrow to speed clean to prepare for the "meet and greet"....should be fun!

The way I will wind down is through some live music tonight at the John Street Jam. My friend Jules (a musician who will be playing there in the upcoming months), will be meeting me here momentarily. How much can I get done until she gets here??? Let me take a breathe!!!

PostScript: I used to be the Director of the AmeriCorps Program at SUNY New Paltz. Our motto was "Getting things done!

Photos sent by Pop-Pop

Snake Encounter #7

Today I had my 7th encounter with a snake in the past 8 years. Prior to that, I had only seen snakes at the pet store. Not sure why my adult years have been filled with snakes. Many who read my blog have heard the story about the 5 foot black rat snake coiled in my laundry room at the Ashokan house. Two additional 4 foot snakes fell in front of me. One was on a table in my living room, the other on the roof of my house. This is the short version of the story. For a long time I suffered from post traumatic snake disorder. I would see a belt on the floor, and immediate get a rush of anxiety.

When we left the Ashokan house, I was relieved that I would never have to encounter snakes (and bats) ever again. But last year we were ushered out of the water because of a poisonous water moccasin. I vowed to never go to Minnewaska again. But there I was again last month, and came across two additional snakes (albeit much smaller, and they didn’t fall in front of me).

Today’s snake encounter was a 4 foot black rat, about 2 inches in diameter that was slithering in the sand at the Saugerties Beach. Everyone stopped to watch. The lifeguards called their supervisors on the cell phone, mothers gripped their children. I stood silently watching the design it left in the sand, eager to show Alan. A teenage lifeguard followed it, seeming to want to touch it. I encouraged him to leave it alone - that it may scare the children (and adults). I have to admit it gave me a thrill to watch the snake. I think I am starting to really like snakes.

My mother used to joke about how snakes were a sign of fertility. I need to confirm that. Later on tonight when I have time, I may explore the role of snakes in mythology. I'm starting to get a bit curious. There has to be a reason why my life has become full of snakes. (4 the past year) Plus, I seem to be cured of my PTSD.

In the meantime, I promised Jamie that I would post a poem I wrote about snakes which I probably wrote about 5 years ago. It’s based on Jungian psychology. (I can't get the text to coil, so just imagine each line disjointed)

the trickster

i cannot grieve, i can not give
i cannot hold venom
i am
spiritually soft in the sand.

Happy Friday! Then off-line until Monday

This is going to sound like a cheesy creative writing assignment, but I only have a few minutes, and wanted add something to the blog today before the busy weekend begins...I'll probably be off-line until Monday.......

….I’m a lifelong learner with an undying curiosity. The past two years have been an adventure learning how to be a parent. Here are other things that I’d like to do and learn:

- Learn how to speak Spanish or Italian (take a class or an immersion program in Spain/Italy)

- Publish (children’s books, magazine articles)

- Take guitar lessons (this has taken on greater importance lately given Alan’s interest)

- Compete in a Scrabble tournament (I’ve been given the nickname “scrabble hustler”) I’d also like to get better at Chess.

- Visit Italy (The village of Diano!)

- Host a radio show (talk radio) I’d like to expand the show I had at New Paltz called “What We Do” which featured people from interesting and peculiar careers

- Intellectual pursuits - go on an archeological dig, discover ancient artifacts, uncover a buried treasure. I found a bullet once in hole in the woods behind my Ashokan house. I have also found pottery at the top of Overlook Mt.

- Learn quilting/knitting/crochet (mainly create blankets)

I’m sure that there are more things, but Alan just woke up and I want to give him a hug! Have a great weekend!

ENFJ

As many of you know, I am certified to administer the MBTI (Myers Briggs Personality Inventory). I know that some of you who read my blog are interested in taking this assessment, and some of you already know your code. (some like Mom and Dad I can guess!).

I think I have a few self-scoring assessments in my attic should you want to take it.... Specifically, I have a friend who is interested in learning more about how to use this assessment to assist with career exploration.

Below is a sample of the information you can get from the MBTI using my code as an example. Here's the website if you already know your code and want more info and an explanation of the codes..http://www.e-mbti.com/index.php

My code is ENFJ. Below is my code explained ( more than you probably want to know).

ENFJ - THE GIVER (THE TEACHER)

EXPLANATION BASED ON THE RESEARCH OF CARL JUNG, KATHARINE C. BRIGGS AND ISABEL BRIGGS MYERS
As an ENFJ, you're primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in primarily via your intuition. ENFJs are people-focused individuals. They live in the world of people possibilities. More so than any other type, they have excellent people skills. They understand and care about people, and have a special talent for bringing out the best in others.

ENFJ's main interest in life is giving love, support, and a good time to other people. They are focused on understanding, supporting, and encouraging others. They make things happen for people, and get their best personal satisfaction from this.

Because ENFJ's people skills are so extraordinary, they have the ability to make people do exactly what they want them to do. They get under people's skins and get the reactions that they are seeking.

ENFJ's motives are usually unselfish, but ENFJs who have developed less than ideally have been known to use their power over people to manipulate them. ENFJ's are so externally focused that it's especially important for them to spend time alone. This can be difficult for some ENFJs, because they have the tendency to be hard on themselves and turn to dark thoughts when alone. Consequently, ENFJs might avoid being alone, and fill their lives with activities involving other people.

ENFJs tend to define their life's direction and priorities according to other people's needs, and may not be aware of their own needs. It's natural to their personality type that they will tend to place other people's needs above their own, but they need to stay aware of their own needs so that they don't sacrifice themselves in their drive to help others.

ENFJ's tend to be more reserved about exposing themselves than other extraverted types. Although they may have strongly-felt beliefs, they're likely to refrain from expressing them if doing so would interfere with bringing out the best in others. Because their strongest interest lies in being a catalyst of change in other people, they're likely to interact with others on their own level, in a chameleon-like manner, rather than as individuals. Which is not to say that the ENFJ does not have opinions. ENFJs have definite values and opinions which they're able to express clearly and succinctly. These beliefs will be expressed as long as they're not too personal.

ENFJ is in many ways expressive and open, but is more focused on being responsive and supportive of others. When faced with a conflict between a strongly-held value and serving another person's need, they are highly likely to value the other person's needs.

The ENFJ may feel quite lonely even when surrounded by people. This feeling of aloneness may be exacerbated by the tendency to not reveal their true selves. People love ENFJs. They are fun to be with, and truly understand and love people. They are typically very straight-forward and honest. Usually ENFJs exude a lot of self-confidence, and have a great amount of ability to do many different things. They are generally bright, full of potential, energetic and fast-paced. They are usually good at anything which captures their interest.

ENFJs like for things to be well-organized, and will work hard at maintaining structure and resolving ambiguity. They have a tendency to be fussy, especially with their home environments. In the work place, ENFJs do well in positions where they deal with people. They are naturals for the social committee. Their uncanny ability to understand people and say just what needs to be said to make them happy makes them naturals for counseling. They enjoy being the center of attention, and do very well in situations where they can inspire and lead others, such as teaching.

ENFJs do not like dealing with impersonal reasoning. They don't understand or appreciate its merit, and will be unhappy in situations where they're forced to deal with logic and facts without any connection to a human element. Living in the world of people possibilities, they enjoy their plans more than their achievements. They get excited about possibilities for the future, but may become easily bored and restless with the present.

ENFJs have a special gift with people, and are basically happy people when they can use that gift to help others. They get their best satisfaction from serving others. Their genuine interest in Humankind and their exceptional intuitive awareness of people makes them able to draw out even the most reserved individuals.

ENFJs have a strong need for close, intimate relationships, and will put forth a lot of effort in creating and maintaining these relationships. They're very loyal and trustworthy once involved in a relationship. An ENFJ who has not developed their Feeling side may have difficulty making good decisions, and may rely heavily on other people in decision-making processes. If they have not developed their Intuition, they may not be able to see possibilities, and will judge things too quickly based on established value systems or social rules, without really understanding the current situation.

An ENFJ who has not found their place in the world is likely to be extremely sensitive to criticism, and to have the tendency to worry excessively and feel guilty. They are also likely to be very manipulative and controling with others. In general, ENFJs are charming, warm, gracious, creative and diverse individuals with richly developed insights into what makes other people tick. This special ability to see growth potential in others combined with a genuine drive to help people makes the ENFJ a truly valued individual. As giving and caring as the ENFJ is, they need to remember to value their own needs as well as the needs of others.

Hold on to 16

Pop-Pop was watching Alan, and with my cell phone dead in the car, I made a nervous trip to Adams. I badly needed to replenish my home with fresh vegetables and fruits, but felt reluctant leaving, especially knowing how much of a handful Alan has been lately. During the ride, the rain started to pour heavily, and my mind raced with all of the other things I needed to get done…

I turned on the radio, and John Cougar was singing one of my favorite songs, Jack and Diane. I remember this song like it was yesterday -

“Hold on to sixteen
as long as you can
Changes come around real soon
Make us women and men”

Am I really 37 with a 2 year old? I thought back to when I turned 16. My “sweet sixteen” birthday party was held in the garage of my Long Island home, not a fancy banquet hall streamed in pink. It was the 80’s and I had frizzy permed hair. Chris Russo and Eric Farkas spun records for my party, break dancing on a wooden board. Wendy and I were elated that Paulo would be coming. We both had a crush him, a 21 year old Brazilian guitarist who rode a motor cycle and didn’t speak English. We would see him playing his guitar at the pizza place. He sung in Portuguese. His music was in stark contrast to the manufactured synthesized music of the 80’s, making it much more alluring. He played a tune for me at my party which he said he had written for me as a gift; one of the highlights of my youth. I only wish I could remember what it sounded like.

“Oh yeah life goes on
Long after the thrill of livin is gone
Oh yeay say life goes on
Long after the thrill of livin is gone, they walk on”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lWvcmgfcSg

If I had a hammer

Back in 1991, when I worked across the newsroom at WTZA-TV, I always heard Mary S. singing, “If I had a Hammer”. Sometimes I think I can still hear her singing it when she jogs past my house….Two years ago, I began singing that song to Alan, changing the lyrics to: “If I had a hammer, I hammer like Jimmy (my fix-all neighbor). Today, Alan plucked the strings of his guitar and began singing this tune. I recently learned that 116 versions have been created from this Peter, Paul and Mary song. That’s what happens when words synergize with music. Here is a sample…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r5dTlg2cyls


PostScript: I also took another Peter Paul and Mary song, Puff the Magic Dragon, and created lyrics to account for Alan’s early talking and appearance on television, though I may not have gotten the melody just right….

The day started out a bit....

The day started out a bit dark for me, but seems trivial compared to what others had to report. My sister's friend died of a heart attack at age 35, and another friend was in a car accident (he's okay). Hearing this news put things in perspective for me. I tried to make the best of it, appreciating all of that I have. My day became brighter.

I just returned from a barefoot walk in the rain.

I just returned from a barefoot walk in the rain. Flashes of lightning in the dark sky followed by the loud boom of thunder seemed to exhilarate me. I had an umbrella. I had my shoes. But I abandoned both as I approached my house. When was the last time I walked on wet grass or jumped in a puddle? Actually, if you saw me on my lawn, it looked more like I was marching in circles or even executing an exotic rain dance. Maybe it’s because I spent most of the day outdoors, and I was still very hot from this incredible heat. I may have looked a little silly, but with the neighbors already in for the night, I couldn’t resist being a little playful…..I wonder what the weather will be like tomorrow?

Postscript: Having been incredibly social and busy recently, I decided that I needed to spend the day alone to rest and reconnect. I found myself heading down 212 to Woodstock. Only 15 minutes from my house, I still find myself appreciating it’s beauty and recalled many fond memories of the time spent here….(Helen/tattoo, Marie/Christmas open house, the team of Roger & Paul (and Clayton)…Debra and the chocolate-covered coffee beans, Eileen/Magic Meadow, the Weiss summer house, California Quarry hike with Uncle Tony, the fireworks, library fairs, seeing Uma, etc.). I did a lot of looking in the boutiques along with some people-watching….I ended up buying a Mexican sacred heart made of tin.

Start your engines!

Thunderbirds, Mustangs, Corvettes and other hot rods/vintage cars began arriving to the village as early as 10 am yesterday morning turning our Main Street into a parking lot. Living a block away from the event, I felt part of the action (despite owning an ordinary 4-door Doge Status with no knowledge of cars). Throughout the morning, I could hear revving of engines and music playing from the sound stage. I wasn’t able to make it there until the afternoon when Pop-Pop, Jimbist and Pierre arrived. Alan was very excited them, especially Jimbist.

Luckily Alan (who didn’t nap) was agreeable to the stroller, making it much easier for us to navigate through the streets. At times, he wanted to get up and “go inside” the cars (and the Saxton fire engine), but he was easily diverted. My favorites were the vintage cars (cant’ retain all names and years) as well as a modern looking purple Trans am with an engine that appeared more like a golden sculpture.

Three sound stages were positioned throughout the village, and we stopped at each one. My favorite was a red-headed 11-year-old boy named Miles who played keyboards to Ray Charles, then impressed the crowd by picking up an electric guitar to sing Mustang Sally. Later, I ran into him and told him that he was "fabulous!"...At the other corner of town, the Big Smoothies performed including an Elvis impersonator....as well as a group called the Phantoms. Alan was rivited by the music....

Afterwards, we had a BBQ at my house, and then set off to Stella’s for ice cream.

Postscript: This may suprise you, but I would love to own a vintage car and/or antique fire truck. Roger and I have often thought about creating a business that would include driving an antique fire truck to children's birthday parties....

i loved the mountain festival tonight

i loved the mountain festival tonight. ivan held alan’s hand in the meadow. i learned the art of skipping stones at the pond. an 8 year old said she was afraid to drink water. i asked her why. same water probably drunk by dinosaurs.

i ate halwa. alan ate a hotdog. portia shared her kettle corn. melanie let me sample her mango yogurt juice.

we played with lambs, goats and horses. ivan slid down the hill on a sack and sifted through hay.

i looked at pottery, glass and batik.

drumming and more drumming

lollipop in the car on the ride home.

It’s a messy, messy world!

Alan is a funny kid. When he’s tired, he likes to twirl his hair with his finger. But when he’s wide awake, he likes to mush things in his hair with his fingers including peanut butter, sweet potatoes and scrambled eggs. Just when I thought this phase was almost over, we had a major set-back.

Today we spent the morning with Melanie and Ivan finger-painting. Alan eagerly sat in “Louis’s Big Chair” waiting for their arrival, telling me that he wanted to play with “yellow and blue”.…When our guests arrived, I offered Ivan a smock. But Melanie had a better idea. She just took off Ivan’s shirt. (Genius!).

Bare-chested like two cavemen, I plopped a gob of red paint in front of Ivan. He looked at me with his sweet eyes, and then it occurred to me that this was his first finger-painting excursion….boy was he in for a treat! I began illustrating the fine art of finger-painting which I guess to a 3-year-old is antithetical to what has been learned when sitting at the kitchen table. It didn’t take long for him to pick it up! He began making squiggly lines with his finger until all ten were covered in red….

Everything was going as well as expected, (messy but controlled)….but then all of a sudden….Alan scooped a blob of blue paint right from the jar, and began squishing it between his fingers as if wringing his hands to plot out his next move. In the blink of an eye, Alan was scrubbing his hair with “blue” turning the finger-painting into an exercise in performance art!

While some moms would scold him with disgust while grabbing the nearest paper towel, I took a different approach and grabbed the camera. An article I read recently (name escapes me), says that mothers should encourage their children to make messes – to let them explore different sensations (gooey hair). It enhances their creativity (and fine motor skills).

Where else but in childhood, can one have the uninhibited opportunity to happily explore the world (and one’s hair), while creating an enormous mess without the worry of having to clean-up? ….Lucky kid!

Postscript: Roger matter-of-factly asked me why the tub was purple….

Today’s beetle discovery 5pm.

If a ladybug lands on you, it’s supposed to be good luck. I wonder what it means when you find the largest brown beetle in Ulster County stuck to your blue canvas beach chair in your front yard. To verify its size, I called on my neighbors, Jimmy and Miera while also enthusiastically inviting passers-by to take a look. Rudy’s mother thought it wasn’t real. (But then it moved, and we all jumped). Another person thought it was a Japanese Beetle. Jimmy sized it at about ¾ of an inch long, but I think it was probably closer to an inch in size.

I wish Alan was a little older to appreciate my discovery, but he was more interested in playing “little guy” with his bus on the porch. Before the beetle flew and/or crawled away, I quickly ran to my kitchen and grabbed an old pesto jar and punctured some holes on the cap. I ran back outside and scooped the beetle into the jar. Having lived through three indoor snake incidents (3-5 feet in length), capturing a one inch beetle seemed uncomplicated. I added some grass (I’m not sure why, but it seemed like the right thing to do). This would be his temporary home until after dinner when I could study it more closely.

I placed the jar next to me while I snapped the green beans. So many questions entered my mind. As I tossed a raw green bean into my mouth, I wondered about what beetles eat. Was he hungry? I wondered about the role of beetles in our environment. Why did it land on my chair? Then I began to feel guilty about having captured another living thing. Was it scared? Did it want to go home?

After rushing through dinner, I excused myself so that I could research my beetle. My time is so limited these days, and researching beetles may not be the most appropriate use of my time, but it was worth examining. Imagine how I felt when I learned that there are “more species of beetles than species of plants! There are about 350,000 named species of beetles in the world and many more unnamed species. In the United States and Canada alone, there are almost 24,000 species!!”

Unnamed species of beetles? Where do I begin?

The closest I could estimate is that he is a bean leaf beetle. However, these types of beetles only measure at ¼ of an inch, and my beetle was much bigger. Not wanting to over think this, I deduced that he was most likely one of the thousands within this category.

Instead of trying to "name" my beetle, I decided to spend the rest of my time looking into the bigger beetle question: What is the role of the beetle? Why will they thrive even after human life becomes extinct?

Before releasing my beetle back to my front lawn, I tried to memorize his features (spotless and brown) so I could always remember my time with him. I’ll always wonder if he was one of those “unnamed” beetles waiting for a scientist to discover him under a rock in some exotic tropic island (or on a blue canvas beach chair). Just my luck!

4th of July Parade

Even with the cloudy skies and drizzle, it did my heart good to see the children scurrying around on the porch, reaching for a cookie and happily sharing toys. (My father was in disbelief that so many children interacted together without one crying “incident”).

You could definitely feel the anticipation (both children and adults) as we waited for that first drumbeat and flicker of light from the fire truck. As the opening marching band approached we eagerly proceeded to the curb where I had strategically placed several of our beach chairs. While the other children nestled on the laps of their parents, Alan enjoyed the freedom of wandering the yard without my constant lecture about handholding. Occasionally he would climb atop his “popper” to watch the surprising sights around him. I watched Ava covet his “ride”, so I added another vehicle from Alan’s fleet creating a little parade of our own in my front yard.

While I am partial to fire trucks (mainly because of Alan’s interest), my favorite floats have always been the ones with live music. Several caught my eye this year. But it’s hard to go into any more detail, because here’s the downside to parades. You can only enjoy the music for a moment, and then it’s - - - more fire trucks. So it’s a challenge keeping the children interested. If you’re lucky, a lollipop will land on your lap.

Intermittent showers had some of us back on the porch, but several diehards like Julie and Jace stayed curbside. Eventually, after the fumes of the antique tractors had us light-headed, we all re-convened on the porch for some more blueberry cobbler (made by moi!), chocolate chip cookies (a la Jamie), pumpkin bread (Julie), as well as some real lunch food.

While passing out lemonade spritzers (non alcoholic), I thought about those cupcakes which I had made last night sitting in my fridge. With all of the candy, cookies and sweet breads that the children had already consumed, I thought if I brought out one more once of sugar, the parents would never speak to me again! So after everyone left, I walked over to the firehouse. The party there was just beginning. I handed them to the lieutenant and thanked him for a job well done.

Garden Song

I couldn’t find a performance on the net with Dave Mallett performing the Garden Song, but I just found John Denver singing it on the Muppet Show(of all places!) Below is the link to the YouTube video. This song has special meaning. It’s the lullaby we sing to Alan. (which Eileen sang to Roger when he was a baby)

Alan hasn’t seen this John Denver performance yet. I can’t wait to show him. Take a look. It's like visiting an old friend....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6NIumQsg7g

Baking the Cake

(Hello Folks! If you're here to read about Jamie's party, it's the next blog entry below this one. This entry is my egocentric experience of baking the cake..)

Baking the Cake

Though my husband calls me “Cake”, this nickname does not live up to my baking skills. In fact, my first inkling when offering to bake the cake for Jamie’s birthday was to purchase one from Price Chopper. It’s fast, easy and for the most part, tasty. My second gut reaction was to buy a box cake and pray that nobody asked me if it was made from scratch.

It’s not that I didn’t want to show effort, it’s just that I wasn’t sure if I could abandon all of my fears, and I wasn’t sure if I had enough courage to take the risk of baking one from scratch….What if everybody hates it! What it if it’s gooey inside!

Thinking about how Jamie has been the “real deal”, (no pretense or phoniness here), I just couldn’t let her eat a cake made by a factory or faceless baker. Plus, she makes just about everything from scratch – muffins, cookies, granola, you name it!

I decided to take the risk, and knowing how much she loves pineapples, I decided to try out a pineapple/carrot/coconut cake that I found on a baking website.

What if people don’t like pineapple? What if I screw up? But like a skilled culinary therapist, I tried to dispute my dysfunctional beliefs, replacing them with positive thoughts…this will be the best cake ever!!

I wasn’t so sure.

First, I didn’t have all of the tools necessary. I don’t have a food processor. (well there is one in my attic picked up at a yard sale, but I don’t know how it works) What if I didn’t chop the carrots small enough and an innocent child spontaneously began choking on a carrot bit? Boy, this recipe called for lots of carrots. What if it tasted more like a salad than sweet?

I don’t have a sifter. (I’m not sure what one even looks like). So I combined the flour, baking powder and baking soda as best I could, creating a lightly coat of freshly fallen snow on the table. Then, I looked more closely at my measuring spoon. Ooops! I realized that I had a ½ teaspoon, and not a full teaspoon, so I had to add and mix again….

The recipe called for “crushed pineapples” Another oops. I contemplated digging through my attic to search for that food processor.

Finally the 3 mixing bowls of ingredients were combined together, and I poured the batter into a large rectangular cake pan. I'm supposed to pre-heat the over? The recipe said that the normal “tooth pick test” would not work for this cake, because it is too moist. My anxiety level increased. How will I know it’s done!

I set the timer, and walked out of the kitchen, urging Alan to stop eating carrot bits off the floor…..

45 minutes later, I peeked into the oven, and the cake looked pretty good. I let it cool for the rest of the day, and started mixing the ingredients for the frosting. Once the cake was frosted, I sprinkled the top with nuts and took a heart-shaped cookie cutter. I placed it in the middle of the cake, and sprinkled the remaining coconut creating a white heart in the middle.

If you’re with me this far….I thought it came out delicious, but I can’t say for sure how everyone else felt. But nobody choked. Nobody died…and the children had a nice helping of fruits and vegetables under that frosting……Love, Cake

The best collusions are those involving.......

The best collusions are those involving _________. There are many possible answers to the fill in the blank, but my favorite collusions are those involving birthdays. You know the kind - secret e-mails with co-conspirators, whispered conversations with the birthday girl in the next room, a wink of an eye when her back is turned…Finally, it all came together as planned, and yesterday we secretly convened for Jamie’s 30th birthday party/picnic at yellow park.

Jamie started putting the pieces together about a week ago. Apparently, I had told her that I was notorious for giving surprise parties. What?! How foolish of me to spontaneously say such a thing! In addition, she said that too many people were inquiring about her weekend plans, another clue that something was in the works.

Her husband arranged for them to go on a family outing to the park. As they were walking, they were seen by some of the co-conspirators in a car heading to the party. Her husband tried to divert her attention. At that point, her suspicions were confirmed. As they approached, we all yelled “surprise”, and an embarrassed Jamie began to blush. She had told us previously that she didn’t like “adult” birthday parties, which had me a little worried, but her husband reassured me that it would be okay.

I hope she enjoyed herself...we all did!! The setting was perfect, familiar to all of us who have used yellow park as a center point of our playdates. This time, I covered the normally bare picnic tables with beautiful white linen table clothes, and had picked a bouquet of hydrangeas as a centerpiece. However, with the breeze, the blue glass vase toppled over shattering into a million pieces. I am hoping that this is a sign of good luck!

Everyone brought delicious things to eat: fruit salad, cucumber sandwiches, pasta salad, pina coladas… I baked the cake...As Jamie has a love affair with pineapples, I chose a Pineapple/Carrot/Coconut cake. E-mail me should you want the recipe.......I may post something later about baking this cake. It was quite an event!

As a gift, we chipped in for a gift certificate to the local tattoo parlor. Jamie and I have shared tattoo stories, and she told me that she wants to get more. So we thought that since she is moving next month (sob!), that giving her a tattoo from Saugerties would be a nice way to remember all of the people she has touched the past year. So I guess in some ways, this birthday party was also a way to communicate to her how much she has been loved by so many of us this year! She will be missed, but we wish her the best!!! !

Friday-Saturday/End of June

FRIDAY
Freaky Friday : The knock at the door couldn’t have come at a better time. Alan was refusing lunch, crying inconsolably at the table, and I was at my wits end trying to figure out what to do next. In a last ditch effort to console him, I playfully exclaimed that maybe it was the mailman at the door, and tried to usher him out of his seat to check with me. (He normally loves the mailman). But he wouldn’t budge and clanked his fork onto his plate.

Having run out of strategies, I looked at my watch to see if naptime was approaching, and walked to the door praying that it wasn’t someone complaining to me about the noise level. (How ironic that would be).

I opened the door, and it was Jimmy, my next door neighbor. He’s a retired 67-year-old second father who always has great timing whether it be showing up with a bucket when the roof leaks, or a hammer to put in some drywall. This time, he smiled at me holding a toy fire truck in his hand as if a gentleman holding out a delicate boutique of flowers. Or better yet, he was more like Superman coming to save the day! Thanks Jimmy!

SATURDAY
Farmers Market Visit
Each year, our farmer’s market brings new vendors, expanding local offerings of fresh fruits and vegetables, desserts and breads as well as homemade gourmet food such as jelly, syrup and granola. Live music played (a bass player) while I visited each table. A former NYC advertising designer, who I worked with briefly when he was exploring a career in mental health, has established a baking business with his new wife. They had delicious pies and sweat breads for sale.

I found my neighbor, a videgrapher at a flight school, there as well. This was his first day in twenty years selling desserts using recipes he learned as a child. I purchased some pure maple syrup for making granola (there was a woman selling granola who adamantly told me to never use the sugar free kind). Plus, for $1.00, I bought baby spinach that I’ll sauté with some grape tomatos for lunch today. By far my favorite was the dried vegetables that are sprinkled with sea salt that you can eat like potato chips. I identified rutabaga, sweet potatoes, green beans, and carrots. I returned home via the backyard, and picked some glorious blue hydrangeas (which I had seen for sale at the farmer’s market). I put them in a blue glass jar placed them on the table.

Party Girl
Portia’s 40th Birthday Party: Surrounded by friends and food, I teasingly asked who was the next person to turn 40. As people shared their numbers (some in months), it never occurred to me that it would be me. Now mind you, one or two of those people had already passed that marker, but most of the attendees who were privy to this conversation were at least 5-6-7 years behind me. As the conversation shifted to sharing engagement rings and wedding stories while Alan darted down the hallway to explore the house, I suddenly felt older and wiser.